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Nothing can be done except little by little.
- Charles Baudelaire

bbcmolly:

mayhemiia:

I just want to reblog this eVERYDAY FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE

THIS IS LITERALLY THE BEST THING IN EXISTENCE

gabifresh:

take no shit 2014

sexcake:

THIS MAKE MES LAUGH EVERY FUCKING TIME

sexcake:

THIS MAKE MES LAUGH EVERY FUCKING TIME

thedaysaltsavedmylife:

hemlockandharmony:

afternoonsnoozebutton:

maxfuckingbemis:

she’s 23 and she didn’t know she had a vagina until 5 days ago

This is why we don’t do close readings of 50 Shades of Grey.

I’m laughing so hard I forgot about this line completely this is EXACTLY why we should do close readings because it’s so funny.

I thought this was about sleeping at first hahahahaha

thedaysaltsavedmylife:

hemlockandharmony:

afternoonsnoozebutton:

maxfuckingbemis:

she’s 23 and she didn’t know she had a vagina until 5 days ago

This is why we don’t do close readings of 50 Shades of Grey.

I’m laughing so hard I forgot about this line completely this is EXACTLY why we should do close readings because it’s so funny.

I thought this was about sleeping at first hahahahaha

i-once-had-a-guy-tell-me:

I once had a drunk guy tell me I was too sexy to be shooting up at a party. He knocked the needle out of my hands and stepped on the pen, shattering the casing, telling me I should thank him by giving him my number and a kiss. It was my diabetes medicine.

(submitted by anonymous)

theeverydaygoth:

See the thing about being an evil villain is that instead of letting your inner demons fester and weaken you, you can control them and ride your majestic, winged beasts of terror into battle against your enemies

freakology101:

timesnewromney:

shickhard:

It could happen to anyone. People bury a person alive to scare them or to get rid of them. In this situation, rely only on yourself.

  1. Do not waste oxygen. In a classic coffin there’s only enough oxygen for about an hour, maybe two. Inhale deeply, exhale very slowly. Once inhaled - do not swallow, or you will start to hyperventilate. Do not light up lighters or matches, they will waste oxygen. Using a flashlight is allowed. Screaming increases anxiety, which causes increased heartbeat and therefore - waste of oxygen. So don’t scream.
  2. Shake up the lid with your hands. In some cheap low-quality coffins you will be able to even make a hole (with an engagement ring or a belt buckle.)
  3. Cross your arms over your chest, holding onto your shoulders with your hands, and pull the shirt off upward. Tie it in a knot above your head, like so: imageThis will prevent you from suffocating when the dirt falls on your face. 
  4. Kick the lid with your legs. In some cheap coffins the lid is broken or damaged already after being buried, due to the weight of the ground above it. 
  5. As soon as the lid breaks, throw and move the dirt that falls through in the direction of your feet. When it takes up a lot of space, try pressing the ground to the sides of the coffin with your legs and feet. Move around a bit. 
  6. Whatever you do - your main goal is to sit up: dirt will fill up the empty space and move to your advantage, so no matter what - do not stop and try breathing steadily and calmly. 
  7. Get up. Remember: the dirt in the grave is very loose, so battling your way up will be easier than it seems. It’s the other way around during a rainy weather however, since water makes dirt heavy and sticky. 

JUST TO PROVE TUMBLR HAS A SURVIVAL GUIDE FOR FUCKING EVERYTHING.

just in case guys